Anxious about therapy tonight
Tonight is my second appointment with my therapist. She told me last time (2 weeks ago) that I needed to journal my feelings every night. I obeyed and did that for a few days. But I don’t like doing it. It’s so weird to see it all there on paper.
But how is that any different than journalling here? I mean, I talk about all kinds of random junk on here. A lot of it is personal, too. It just feels better doing it here. I hope the therapist says it’s okay that I journal here instead of on paper. I hope she wasn’t expecting me to bring my journal in for her to look at or something.
Journalling here is theraputic, though. I will definitely keep at it here, it just doesn’t feel natural writing it on paper. I feel lame with a book on my nightstand that says “I felt happy today” or “today sucked ass”. It’s strange. But this is somehow not strange. My feelings are out in the universe for anyone to read. But no one really knows it’s me saying it. I mean, they could figure it out if they really wanted to, but I kind of feel like it’s still anonymous enough.
Just for the doc:
“I feel ambivelent today”
Tryin somethin…
We’ll see how this blogging thing works out. I’ve tried it before, but I always felt kinda restrained because people might read it *gasp*. But I know that I need to get stuff out and find a way to express myself. So I’ll use this place to vent, cry, whine, laugh, smile, amuse myself and just be. My goal is to post daily….a journal about my day and a journal of what I ate and my workouts. There will be more than that, though, because I am in front of a computer so much everyday, I know I’ll need a place to go when I get bored. Here goes nothing!
